10 Funny Gaffs from Real Job Application Forms

May 7th, 2010 by Amanda Musto, Social Media Marketing Representative at Treeline, Inc

One-Liners Hiring Managers have seen on Job Applications:

1. I procrastinate, especially when the task is unpleasant.

2. Personal interests: donating blood. Fourteen gallons so far.

3. As indicted, I have over five years of analyzing investments.

4. Instrumental in ruining entire operation for a Midwest chainstore.

5. Note: Please don’t misconstrue my 14 jobs as ‘ job-hopping’ . I have never quit a job.

6. Marital status: often. Children: various.

7. Reason for leaving last job: They insisted that all employees get to work by 8:45 am every morning. I couldn’t work under those conditions.

8. The company made me a scapegoat, just like my three previous employers.

9. Finished eighth in my class of ten.

10. References: none. I’ve left a path of destruction behind me.

“Funny Resumes – Will and Guy’s Humour – One Liners from Job Applications.” Web log post. Will and Guy’s Funny Jokes, Short Stories and Amusing Pictures. Web. 07 May 2010. <http://www.guy-sports.com/humor/jokes/jokes_resume.htm>.

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